Aging:

Eventually you will reach a point
when you stop lying about your age
and start bragging about it.

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The older we get,
the fewer things
seem worth waiting in line for.

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Some people
try to turn back their odometers.
Not me!
I want people to know 'why'
I look this way.
I've travelled a long way
and some of the roads weren't paved.

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When you are dissatisfied
and would like to go back to youth,
think of Algebra.

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You know you are getting old when
everything either dries up or leaks.

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One of the many things
no one tells you about aging
is that it is such a nice change
from being young.

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Ah, being young is beautiful,
but being old is comfortable.

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First you forget names,
then you forget faces.
Then you forget to pull up your zipper.
It's worse when
you forget to pull it down.

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Long ago
when men cursed
and beat the ground with sticks,
it was called witchcraft...

Today, it's called golf.