Senility

A Senior Moment at Church:

A Preacher was explaining that he must move on to a larger
congregation that could pay him more. There is a hush within the
congregation. No one wants him to leave.

Joe Smith, who owns several car dealerships in the city, stands up
and proclaims, "If the Preacher stays, I will provide him with a new
Cadillac every year, and his wife with a Honda mini-van to transport
their children!" The congregation sighs in relief, and applauds.

Sam Brown, a successful entrepreneur and investor, stands and says,
"If the Preacher will stay on here, I'll personally double his
salary, and also establish a foundation to guarantee the college
education of all his children!" More sighs and loud applause.

Joe Tavares stands up and says, "If the preacher stays I will provide
him with all the wine he wants."

Sadie Jones, age 88, stands and announces with a smile, "If the
Preacher stays, I will give him sex!"

There is total silence. The Preacher, blushing, asks her, "Mrs.
Jones, whatever possessed you to say that?"

Sadie's 92 year old husband Jake is now trying to hide, holding his
forehead with the palm of his hand and shaking his head from side to
side, while his wife replies, "Well, I just asked my husband how we
could help, and he said, 'Screw him!'"

Isn't senility wonderful? Lord, keep your arm around my shoulder
with your hand over my mouth!!

Sorry, folks, but I had to share with you!